Thursday, 01 December, 2022


Rejection to accomplishment

“I’ve been at zero a few times, come back a few times, and done it over and over. I’ve had to change careers several times. Sometimes because my interests changed, sometimes because all bridges have been burned beyond recognition, sometimes because I desperately needed money; and sometimes just because I hated everyone in my old career or they hated me.” James Altucher This title is quite paradoxical right? Well, the good news is that Paradoxes are neither lies nor half-truths; they are just statements that appear contradictory but the reality is that they are true in every way. But, is this one true? The mind that’s set on success, winning, and making an impact, is already potentially at that junction before physically getting there because it sees the BIG picture, envisions a possible end, has a fair idea of what the result might be and so it’s ready to forge ahead regardless of the multiple challenges it encounters on the journey. For such minds, rejection is the tonic that propels them to the impossible heights they reach. Rejections actually energize rather than dampen their morale. Wow…! Did I say something you never really thought of prior to this? Well, there’s always a first time and that’s why we’re infested by the learning bug anyway. Let’s consider a few premises and see if the dots will connect: “Living for a Purpose: If you are living for a Purpose, you do not bother about the present distress. You know the purpose for which you’re here.” Having a Definite Chief Aim: A purposeful life means living with a Definite Chief Aim in focus. I read that some years ago from Napoleon Hill’s Classic: The Law of Success. Now, regardless of whatever or however financially rewarding a present engagement is, a visionary who’s attuned to where he/she is going is neither dissuaded from the future nor carried away by the present case. There can be really down and discouraging times but like they say “tough times don’t last, tough people, do.” Tough people know that the present is only a guiding experience and light for the future, which they’re curiously living in NOW! It’s the same when it’s the opposite. Going through a hard time at the moment is merely preparing and equipping you for the future. You live in the assurance that these challenges will not consume you but that they will push you towards the attainment of your goals, whether short, medium, or long term. It’s about learning the ropes. Rejections actually teach the needful lessons we require to manage the Success of Tomorrow. Or didn’t you know that it’s much more difficult to manage success than to find it? HOW DO I DISCOVER MY PURPOSE FOR LIVING? “One key marker of transition to adulthood is accepting, and being content with reality.” Jeffrey Arnett. The answer to this very fundamental, yet profound question is easy if you accept to live sincerely with the deep convictions and persuasions that you are often in conflict with. Living in denial is one reason you are easily influenced by what others do. You are forced always to model and pattern your life according to external influences that do not resonate with your depth. A few thoughts should help. ▪ Learn to Enjoy Seclusion It is in seclusion that you usually probe into your depths. Unfortunately, you cannot separate yourself from the reality of meditation and the practice of mindfulness and hope to connect with your depth, where your sterling resources are deposited. Hidden within your inner being is your true self and you must connect with it, unearth it and use it to the benefit of others if you must find satisfaction. This precedes every external comfort. Truth is that during the time of developing your inner resource, you may be misunderstood by the very people for whom your practice and life purpose is meant. These may be the ones who would first ignore you, jest and heckle at you and eventually cast you aside but you have got to grow a thick skin. This position is non-negotiable. Suck it in while you can; it’s the demand of the time and is meant to actually shape you. Brood over each experience in your seclusion and keep each where it belongs. See them for what they are: the impetus for impact. ▪ Get Comfortable with Discomfort No good thing comes easy. As true as people are often mentored to find a niche area and develop it, it takes almost everything to arrive at that niche point. Sacrifice is the name of the game and you must truly be friendly with discomfort to attain comfort. The following may interest you: One man suffered rejection more often than acceptance in his search for relevance: Abraham Lincoln another struggled academically throughout the elementary school: Ben Carson and another used to sleep on the floor in friends’ rooms, returning Coke bottles for food, money, and getting weekly free meals at a local temple: Steve Jobs another’s teachers used to call him a failure: Tony Blair what about the other who was in prison for 27 years but came out to become president? Nelson Mandela ▪ Reconcile with your Passion; not Gratifications When the chips are down, when everything goes wrong, when everyone decides to leave, please, stay connected with your Passion and fuel it continuously, (not continually). Reconcile only with your Passion even when everyone else stays out. Then, you would better understand the strength of seclusion. Oftentimes, explorers, due to rejection, are led to great discoveries almost alone. Doesn’t that sound like the story of Evan Williams, one of the co-founders of Twitter? Evan was the founder of Blogger. At a time there was no money left at Blogger, and no employees left, and no prospects left, but he kept going. Every day he was CEO, customer service, tech developer, community manager, and business development. He came through his desert. He got bought by Google. He started Twitter. Does that sound like a familiar story? James Altucher. You can discover passion by doing that which resonates with your inner being after you have spent many months and years developing your thoughts about it and finding inner peace with yourself, regardless of immediate gains or what anyone else says or does. Essentially, the consistent doing of that endeavor is a key in which value is proved based on the impact it has on the environment; it’s beyond selfish benefits. Final Thoughts Let me end this on this note. The search for Relevance and Impact has never been a tea party. Rather, it’s usually a frustrating and enervating experience where failures often lead you to doubt the only being you should actually trust: yourself. My advice has never changed: Learn from the Masters. Choose a Mentor and observe him/her from afar if you have no physical access to him/her. Read their books. Forge ahead willy-nilly and learn that if it’s going to result in good success, it has to be earned at an invaluable cost. No good thing comes easy. Author: Joseph Ayeni Cerebral-Thrust  

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